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Stop Saying “You’re So Smart” – Growth Mindset

Last year, my school invited Eduardo Briceño to talk to us about the importance of having a growth mindset, a concept from his book “The Power of Belief – Mindset and Success”.  He basically asserts that there are two types of people: those who think intelligence and skills are fixed/unchanging and others who believe they are able to be developed/honed.

In his speech and his book, he discusses one thing that we all (likely) have done:  tell a student how smart he/she is or tell a student how good he/she is at a specific skill.  Now, I have heard that telling your kids they are “smart” is not the way to go, but I guess I had filed that info away in a section of my brain that doesn’t get much use.  Well, according to Briceño, doing this puts kids into a fixed mindset where they think they are either good or bad at something and nothing can change that.  He says that children who live in a fixed mindset are less likely to engage in challenging or difficult work because they think it’s just too hard and they can’t do it.

Since I am no longer in the classroom, I decided to use this concept on my 6-year-old to see what kind of affect it had on her.  There are tons of examples that I could give that I have done on my own, but I’ll just mention one of them that happened recently with my daughter’s swim teacher.

My daughter takes swimming lessons all year long.  She is the type of kid who could care less about sports and would rather just play at home.  It bothers me because I grew up in sports (I played competitive and college soccer and high school tennis) and have a very competitive spirit.  So, going to swimming is kind of a drag sometimes because she doesn’t always want to go.

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Zakat eligibility of The FYI

The Family & Youth Institute, or The FYI, is a well-known Muslim organization in the United States. It works to promote mental health and wellness by strengthening and empowering individuals, families, and communities through research and education. It has been working for many years to bring Islamic perspectives to understanding and promoting mental health in our communities.

It is dedicated to serving and supporting Muslims – safeguarding our deen, our families, and our future generations. Therefore, the work of The FYI comes in the category of ‘fi sabeelillah’ or the Path of Allah, within the eight categories where Zakat money can be used.

Zakah expenditures are only for the poor and for the needy and for those employed for it and for bringing hearts together [for Islam] and for freeing captives [or slaves] and for those in debt and for the cause of Allah, and for the [stranded] traveler – an obligation [imposed] by Allah, And Allah, is Knowing and Wise.”
(Al-Tawbah 9:60)

According to scholars who widen the meaning of fee sabeelillah to include any activities that promote Islamic growth, The FYI is indeed eligible to receive part of the Zakat funds for its programs and services. I urge Muslims in America to support this organization through their donations, general charity, and through their Zakat. I ask Allah swt to strengthen and guide The FYI to continue its good work in supporting Muslims.

Shaikh Ali Suleiman Ali, PhD

About Shaikh Ali

Sh. Ali Suleiman Ali was born in Ghana where he spent his childhood studying with various Muslim scholars. He then moved to Saudi Arabia and enrolled in the Islamic University of Madina.  He graduated with a degree in both Arabic and Islamic Studies. Dr. Ali went on to complete his Ph.D. in Islamic Studies at the University of Michigan, Ann Arbor.

Sh. Ali serves on the Advisory Council of The Family & Youth Institute. He is the Senior Imam and Director of the Muslim Community of Western Suburbs in Canton, Michigan. Additionally, he serves as the Director of Muslim Family Services in Detroit and is a council member of the Fiqh Council of North America (FCNA). He is also a member of the North American Imams Federation (NAIF) and the Association of Muslim Jurists of America (AMJA).